If you don't try, you fail. <3

11:30am - Last final.
12:00pm - Shopping for new clothes for my trip.
  3:00pm - Work until 10.
10:30pm - Pack my shit!
12:00am - Hopefully be asleep!

  9:00am - Shower and get ready.
10:30am - Get my mother's car tuned up and washed.
  2:00pm - Pack my shit into my mom's car.
  3:00pm - Work until 10.
10:15pm - Head up to Irvine.
11:00pm - Pick up stuff from my grandmother's.
12:00am - Hopefully already be asleep.

  5:00am - Leave for San Francisco.

Rest in peace, Uncle Joe. I wish you made it over here. I miss you so much. We all do. I know my mother does, so much. She's gonna miss you calling her every day. But I know you're happy now and in a better place. That's what keeps me smiling. I love you so. <3 6/12/1956 - 5/3/2010

I have two of the greatest friends in the entire world. After my mother had called me at 12:30 this morning, I immediately called Ethan. We had been texting pretty much my whole drive home, so I knew he was still awake. Unfortunately he didn't answer his phone. So I called Berani and I told him the news and asked if I could come over so I'm not alone. Of course he said yes. He loves me. On my way over there, Ethan calls me back. So I told him the news as well. And what did he say? "Do you want to come over here? Or.. do you want me to go over there? What would you like me to do for you?" I told him he could join me at Berani's house if he would like. So once I get there I ask Berani if he had called, and I guess he said he'd been drinking, so he wasn't able to drive. But he had only had two or three beers. He sobered up and made sure he was completely okay to drive, then called Berani and asked if I was still there and he said he was gonna head over. These boys are my world. The moment Ethan got there he immediately walked over to me and gave me the biggest hug ever. The whole time we were pretty much watching Futurama, Ugly Americans, and South Park. After about an hour I decided I was kinda tired and wanted to go home. Ethan left as well. He gave me another giant hug by our cars and told me to call him if I needed anything. It was very kind of him. Once I got home, though, I got a text from him saying, "I mean it. If there's anything you need. I'm there! Like in the blink of an eye! POW! I'm there." This is coming from someone who rarely shows any emotions whatsoever. I don't think he realized how much that meant to me. I would do anything for them, and now I believe they would do just the same for me.

I have been quite down for the past few days.

Is it because my supervisor got fired on Tuesday? And now work wont be the same. Is it because everybody around me seems to be happy with their friends or significant others? And it makes me realize how lonely I really am. Is it because I feel like my two best friends down here don’t want me around anymore? And I’m being replaced by someone younger, prettier, and I guess a lot more fun to be around. Is it because school is scaring me? And as much as I want to teach, I think I wont be good at it.

I don’t even know. But it’s scaring me. I don’t like being this sad. I don’t like feeling this way. And I don’t like when I don’t have my friends to back me up and catch me when I fall.

But on a good note, I guess. There is a new boy I have become somewhat infatuated with. He is in my Spanish class. And we talk every single day. I got his number too. I am supposed to be hanging out with him on Sunday night. I am hoping this isn’t another Hot-Boy repeat. I don’t want to read the signs wrong. Again. I don’t want to keep trying when there is no reason to try. Again. I don’t want to go through all of the emotions just to be close friends. Again.

I want something to happen.

He got fired. I can't help but feel guilty and partially at fault. Nobody knows why yet. But something tells me I might have something to do with it.

This is so bad. 

It's been awhile. I know. I just don't really have much to say anymore. But here is a list of what I am looking forward to.

-Possibly going clubbing with Courtney and Daisy again.
-A Day To Remember with Berani, Ethan, and Chris.
-Getting my grade back for my last Psych paper that I wrote.
-Summer!
-San Francisco with Tricia. :D
-Visiting my dad in Tennessee.
-EDC.

I miss a lot of people. Like. A LOT of people. And I feel like I'll never get the opportunity to see them. It makes me kind of sad.
That's all I'm really gonna say. I don't feel like going into what's really been going on in my life.

1. Spring Break. Overall.
2. Daisy's Bachelorette party on Friday. ;)
3. Beyond Wonderland with Chris Mann on Saturday.
4. Seeing my new baby nephew, Tyler. Finally.
5. The 25th. My dad is coming to visit from Tenneseee. <3
6. Seeing Mikayla over Spring Break!
7. Berani's birthday on the 29th.
8. Ethan and I are going to Venice Beach/Hollywood on the 31st. (Not sure who else might be going though.)
9. Ty & Carter are coming out on the 1st. :D
10. The A Day To Remember concert with Ethan, Berani, and Chris.

Forget about the shit that we've been through, I wanna stay here forever and always.

 I like Tumblr more than Livejournal. I don't really know why. One thing I do like about LJ though is that you can comment. There is a way to comment on Tumblr though, Courtney just has yet to show me. Anyway.

ekatsimelpmisa.tumblr.com/ <--- Tumblr.
www.formspring.me/caryolio <--- Formspring.

:D





Toodles.

Here is a quick update on my life.

-Work is still good. Not quite hating it yet. Haha.
-School is really good. I'm doing very well and I'm extremely proud of myself.
-I'm sorta seeing my co-worker.
-Things with roommates have been getting better.
-Berani, Ethan, and Chris are still my go-to guys. :)
-My neighbors got evicted.
-Chris, Owen (Ethan's little brother) and I are going to Beyond Wonderland. They're super stoked.
-I got a new phone. (Same number.) That means I need numbers.

And. That's about it.
My life hasn't been that exciting lately. Well, it has been. But. Not enough to really write about it. It's the same old stuff. Party with the boys, school, work, party some more. I guess there is just so much going on where I really don't have much time. But, oh well.

Overall, life is going pretty good.

I swear, come tomorrow this will all be in our past. It might be for the best.

You send me into random moments of depression. But I wish you could see how happy I get sometimes. You would be proud. I hate how much you smoke now. You're not the same person. I feel like sometimes you're just an empty shell. I don't feel like I'm hanging out my friend anymore.. I shouldn't be reading your signs the way I am. But it makes me happy. So I will continue to do so. And I felt missed even though it's only been a week since we've seen each other. I feel like I need to be there for you more seeing your current situation, but it's hard for me. It makes me feel like I'm a bad friend. Asking how you're doing is the best I can do at the moment. It scares me too much. I don't know what's going on with you. Everything is so confusing. You still have to prove everything to me. I'm not gonna let people walk all over me again. Things are different now. I'm different. I hope you don't flake on me. I've missed you so much in the past few months. I might temporarily feel.. partially whole again.

That's life.

So. I pretty much got a job at Bed, Bath, & Beyond. All the manager has to do is call my references and then he'll be able to officially offer me the job at the end of this week. And then I'll start next Tuesday. Finally. :)

I'm kinda shocked that my mom is letting Berani AND Ethan stay the night at her house tonight. I remember my mom refused to let any boys stay the night, let alone one that I was really interested in. She's let Berani stay the night last Wednesday night. But Ethan? Wow.

That's pretty much it. Haha.